Wimbledon has begun over in the land of pom, and with all the excitement, it seems they’ve truly lost the plot.
The traditional fresh strawberries and cream guzzled by the elite who ‘oooh’ and ‘aaah’ once a year at this famous tennis event are in for a surprise. Enter the
strawberries and cream sausage!
Upscale supermarket, Waitrose
have launched the limited edition banger to ‘celebrate the start of the British tennis season’. They needed a new product, and it seems their development team have a closet braai master in their midst.
How on earth?
I mean, how does one re-invent a traditional dish like fresh strawberries and cream? Its beauty and perfection is simply bliss in a mouthful.
“Wait, I know, let’s put it all in a sausage.”
“What?”
“Yes, a sausage, its brilliant, why didn’t I think of that sooner?”
Now, I am the first to defend the wondrousness of the banger. My personal favourite being the salivatingly simple, fat, juicy, ready-to-burst-in-your-mouth, porker.
But to taint its beautiful perfection, with a dessert. Well, in my opinion, this is nothing short of foodie treachery, and the inventor should be made to eat a truckload by himself.
Maybe it’s a Sainsbury’s mole that’s been holding out for the opportunity to really go for the big one. Or perhaps it’s one of our own over there, who is just in terrible need of a braai, and the damp has gone to his head.
Whatever happened, luckily it’s only for two weeks. And luckily it’s only the poor Wimbledon goers, who will be subjected to burning their mouths on hot strawberry jam and cream bombs. Sies man.