As we sat in our
editorial meeting last week, chewing over the previous week’s drunkenness and
debauchery, Sam suddenly fired across the table at me ‘I had that new coffee
wine the other day – what’s it called?’ Luckily I knew the right answer (never
a good idea to be speechless and clueless in editorial meetings), the
Cappupinoccinotage from Boland Kelder. It’s a daft, virtually unpronounceable name,
but clearly catchy enough for both of us to remember a week later.
Mad names are
hugely popular with winemakers around the world. Some involve teasing the
French like our very own Fairview do with their Goats do Roam, their Goat Roti
and the Bored Doe – all responses to the fact that the originals of these names
are only allowed on French wines. Google suggest quite a few more in similar vein
– Chat en Oeuf, which has a cute label of a cat sitting on an egg, Frog’s Leap
Winery in California which makes a Leapfrogmilch Riesling and finally the
Smoking Parrot Sauvignon (Polly Fumé, better known as Pouilly Fumé!).
Some wine
labels get straight to the point – Old Git is popular in the UK and a new
version for the ladies has now been launched called Old Tart. Several other
wineries also target women – I found Mad Housewife Wine, Mommy’s Time Out (which sounds a great idea
to me) and the sleek and smoky Very Sexy Shiraz from Cloof winery here in SA.
On a slightly sourer note, I came across an Australian wine clearly made by a
jilted husband. It was simply called Bitch and the back label had no other text
apart from the name of the wine repeated 77 times. What did she do to
him I wonder?!
But there’s
no need to go far to find wacky names for wines, we have quite enough oddball
names right here in SA. Cappupinoccinotage is soon to be joined by Vrede en
Lust’s Mocholate (a choc/moch Malbec), The Jam Jar Shiraz and of course
Boekenhoutskloof’s Chocolate Block have long had fans drooling and salivating.
Less appetising perhaps is the new wine from Cape Point, the Splattered Toad
Sauvignon, but at least we have some way to go before we start quaffing the
ultimate disgusting-sounding wine which hails from New Zealand – fancy a glass
of Cat’s Pee on a Gooseberry Bush anyone? Yuck, yuck and triple yuck!
Anyone got
any other hideous or hilarious wine names you think we should try? Email us
cos we’d love to hear about them all.
Cheers