Starters
For a laugh: What did the paper clip say to the magnet?
“I find you very attractive.
For a laugh: Do skunks celebrate Valentine’s Day?
Sure, they’re very scent-imental!
Main course
For laughs: What did the elephant say to his girlfriend?
“I love you a ton!”
For a laugh: What did the bat say to his girlfriend?
“You’re fun to hang around with.”
Things not to say on Valentine’s Day.
“I used to come here all the time with my ex.”
Things not to say on Valentine’s Day.
“I never said you NEED a nose job. I just said it wouldn’t hurt to consider it.”
Dessert
Things not to say on Valentine’s Day.
“Could you excuse me? My cat gets lonely if he doesn’t hear my voice on the answering machine every hour.”
Things not to say on Valentine’s Day.
“I really feel that I’ve grown in the past few years. Used to be I wouldn’t have given someone like you a second look.”
Things not to say on Valentine’s Day.
“I really don’t like this restaurant that much, but I wanted to use this 2-for-1 coupon before it expired.”
Happy Valentine’s Day!