Silly wine names

I'm so excited. We'll be sending out our first Vin-atics newsletter next week full of wine suggestions, food pairings to match them and lots of pics and goss from our fab fun evening in with the Food24 Eds! If you haven’t signed up to join the club yet (and remember it costs absolutely nothing to join and you could win a case of wine every month) then sign up and join the party!


As we sat in our editorial meeting last week, chewing over the previous week’s drunkenness and debauchery, Sam suddenly fired across the table at me ‘I had that new coffee wine the other day – what’s it called?’ Luckily I knew the right answer (never a good idea to be speechless and clueless in editorial meetings), the Cappupinoccinotage from Boland Kelder.  It's a daft, virtually unpronounceable name, but clearly catchy enough for both of us to remember a week later.

Mad names are hugely popular with winemakers around the world. Some involve teasing the French like our very own Fairview do with their Goats do Roam, their Goat Roti and the Bored Doe – all responses to the fact that the originals of these names are only allowed on French wines. Google suggest quite a few more in similar vein – Chat en Oeuf, which has a cute label of a cat sitting on an egg, Frog’s Leap Winery in California which makes a Leapfrogmilch Riesling and finally the Smoking Parrot Sauvignon (Polly Fumé, better known as Pouilly Fumé!).

Some wine labels get straight to the point – Old Git is popular in the UK and a new version for the ladies has now been launched called Old Tart. Several other wineries also target women – I found Mad Housewife Wine,  Mommy’s Time Out (which sounds a great idea to me) and the sleek and smoky Very Sexy Shiraz from Cloof winery here in SA.

On a slightly sourer note, I came across an Australian wine clearly made by a jilted husband. It was simply called Bitch and the back label had no other text apart from the name of the wine repeated 77 times. What did she do to him I wonder?!

But there’s no need to go far to find wacky names for wines, we have quite enough oddball names right here in SA. Cappupinoccinotage is soon to be joined by Vrede en Lust’s Mocholate (a choc/moch Malbec), The Jam Jar Shiraz and of course Boekenhoutskloof’s Chocolate Block have long had fans drooling and salivating.

Less appetising perhaps is the new wine from Cape Point, the Splattered Toad Sauvignon, but at least we have some way to go before we start quaffing the ultimate disgusting-sounding wine which hails from New Zealand – fancy a glass of Cat’s Pee on a Gooseberry Bush anyone? Yuck, yuck and triple yuck!

Anyone got any other hideous or hilarious wine names you think we should try? Email us cos we’d love to hear about them all.




NEXT ON FOOD24X publishes all comments posted on articles provided that they adhere to our Comments Policy. Should you wish to report a comment for editorial review, please do so by clicking the 'Report Comment' button to the right of each comment.

Comment on this story
Comments have been closed for this article.
There are new stories on the homepage. Click here to see them.